i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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