I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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