Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Randomize
