Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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