I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
