So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
