You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
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