Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
