have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize