the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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