In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Randomize
