I need help removing her.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
