I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
