Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
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