Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
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At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
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We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Can you repeat that, but with context?