if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
