3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
