you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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