Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Randomize
