YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
