everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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