Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
