summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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