You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.