You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
