Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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