do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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