I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
