I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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