I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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