Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
