I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize