One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
