Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
