I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
Randomize
