Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
