love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Randomize
