I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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