Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Help. Why am I so naked?
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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