I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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