There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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