but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
