if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
