Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
We need to get me chipped asap
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
