someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
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