we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
When did angry sex become our thing?
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize