Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
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