is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
