He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
he fucked my hip out of place.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Jeff brought me a cup of coffee to my desk. He's getting a blow job.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
