do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
