NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize
